As I rode home today in a rickshaw with my son, my dupatta (head scarf) blowing in the wind, giving directions first in one language than a second and neither of them my first, and with the music blaring from the speakers behind me, the thought entered my mind in full force, "I don't belong here. But where do I belong?"
I mostly felt this way because I realized that the blaring music turned no one's head. No one cares here about "noise pollution." There is no thought to whether others will like your loud music or not, whether it's driving down the street or at 3am at a wedding held out on your street. My noise, is your noise and visa versa. Live with it.
For me, the blaring music was embarrassing, aggravating, and annoying. Why? Because I don't belong. My worldview is different. My thoughts were, "Our noise is going to make everyone look in this direction and there really is no need for encouragement of others to stare at me." I just don't belong.
For me, not belonging has been part of who I am from as far back as I can remember.
First, I was a PK. "Pastor's Kids" just aren't like everyone else. People had a different expectation and outlook on who I was suppose to be. Let the reader not read, "who I was."
From this I went to being a TCK. Third Culture Kids end up with a culture that is cannot be defined by race, language, country of origin, nor host country.
I am a "boarding kid," attending boarding school from the age of 8.
I married into a family from the South, yet another culture.
We then became parents of an almost 12 year old just after our second wedding anniversary which makes me the mother of a college sophomore this year at 33 years old.
Belong?
But what does it mean to "belong?" So many people are looking to figure this out, to find their place in this world. Lives are consumed with people looking for self actualization and finding the meaning of life, pursuing whatever it means for you to be you at your full potential and for you to belong in the community which provides you the praise and security you crave.
But is this what we were made for?
To belong, when it is terms of the world, is only temporary. Temporarily it will leave us feeling welcomed, accepted, and free to be "ourselves" in reaching our full potential.
But again I ask, is this what we were made for?
Why did God make us?
If I ask my 9 year old he will sing to me, "To glorify God and enjoy him forever."
So, is belonging in this world why I am here?
Is feeling accepted, that I belong, and am a unique or normal individual (whichever one I crave) necessary for true "self actualization?"
How will I reach my full potential? By being safe, well-feed, in a stable environment of love and feelings of belonging?
Those things are good but the truth is that I was made by God, for God and through peace with God and walking in his will, I will belong; not to this world but to an everlasting kingdom.
I don't have to fit in or standout in order to belong.
I already belong.
I belong to Jesus.
Belonging is EVERYTHING when it's about belonging to the Kingdom of God!
How thankful I am to be part of the Kingdom of God!
m
I mostly felt this way because I realized that the blaring music turned no one's head. No one cares here about "noise pollution." There is no thought to whether others will like your loud music or not, whether it's driving down the street or at 3am at a wedding held out on your street. My noise, is your noise and visa versa. Live with it.
For me, the blaring music was embarrassing, aggravating, and annoying. Why? Because I don't belong. My worldview is different. My thoughts were, "Our noise is going to make everyone look in this direction and there really is no need for encouragement of others to stare at me." I just don't belong.
For me, not belonging has been part of who I am from as far back as I can remember.
First, I was a PK. "Pastor's Kids" just aren't like everyone else. People had a different expectation and outlook on who I was suppose to be. Let the reader not read, "who I was."
From this I went to being a TCK. Third Culture Kids end up with a culture that is cannot be defined by race, language, country of origin, nor host country.
I am a "boarding kid," attending boarding school from the age of 8.
I married into a family from the South, yet another culture.
We then became parents of an almost 12 year old just after our second wedding anniversary which makes me the mother of a college sophomore this year at 33 years old.
Belong?
But what does it mean to "belong?" So many people are looking to figure this out, to find their place in this world. Lives are consumed with people looking for self actualization and finding the meaning of life, pursuing whatever it means for you to be you at your full potential and for you to belong in the community which provides you the praise and security you crave.
But is this what we were made for?
To belong, when it is terms of the world, is only temporary. Temporarily it will leave us feeling welcomed, accepted, and free to be "ourselves" in reaching our full potential.
But again I ask, is this what we were made for?
Why did God make us?
If I ask my 9 year old he will sing to me, "To glorify God and enjoy him forever."
So, is belonging in this world why I am here?
Is feeling accepted, that I belong, and am a unique or normal individual (whichever one I crave) necessary for true "self actualization?"
How will I reach my full potential? By being safe, well-feed, in a stable environment of love and feelings of belonging?
Those things are good but the truth is that I was made by God, for God and through peace with God and walking in his will, I will belong; not to this world but to an everlasting kingdom.
I don't have to fit in or standout in order to belong.
I already belong.
I belong to Jesus.
Belonging is EVERYTHING when it's about belonging to the Kingdom of God!
How thankful I am to be part of the Kingdom of God!
m
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